Adoption: First The Heart, Then The Home

Sonjia Calit-Kakilala

Since getting married in 2015, God had already planted a seed about adoption in Fidel and I’s hearts. We were believing for the miracle of life in my womb while at the same time knowing the heart of God regarding adoption. That it in itself was a miracle. As we entered our fourth year of marriage this January, we felt the roots of that seed tightening its grip on our hearts. I remember telling Him, “Lord, we hope you give us a cute baby.”

I knew in my heart that something was off with my prayer. Why would cuteness matter? When I realized that orphans need parents, a home, and unconditional love, my prayers took a shift. Instead of asking God to give us a cute baby, I began to ask Him to give me a new heart about adoption. After all, I was once an orphan lovingly adopted by my Heavenly Father into His Kingdom.

Last April, I went to an Operation Blessing medical mission where I was sent so I could cover and tape spiels for The 700 Club Asia as I served with the team.

During that hot day in Rizal, there were a lot of mothers in line with their children hoping to receive medical attention—lots of babies, toddlers, and even children in their tweens. I suddenly found every child cute! It was as if God was telling me, “All my children are cute, Sonjia. I made them in my image and likeness. Will you demonstrate the Gospel the way I want you to? God then had given my heart a new set of eyes for adoption.

From then on, we continued to discover God’s direction for our family by praying, talking about it, and attending ROHEI Foundation’s Family Is The Answer forum.

(Read more about Family Is The Answer here.)

It took only a couple of months after that sweet and humbling moment with God when my husband and I brought home our beautiful baby girl. And you know what? She is BEYOND CUTE—OUT OF THIS WORLD CUTE AND BEAUTIFUL IN UNIMAGINABLE WAYS! She, without effort, stole our hearts, and changed our worlds forever.

When the time came for us to bring our daughter home, we were not completely ready. However, we fully knew that we had to respond to this urgent call—God’s call. There were things we had to wrestle with. We had fears, but we knew in our hearts that fear is never from God. We were financially inadequate, but we knew God’s calling always comes with His provision. We anticipated that it will change the conveniences we had and I wasn’t prepared to lose sleep (haha!), but we also knew that no amount of inconvenience can ever compare to the unfortunate consequences that this innocent baby will have to experience for not having a family.

In all these anxious thoughts, God was firm with His assurance that this is His will, and that His supernatural grace is available.


It’s been four months, and while it still isn’t easy, we are filled with so much joy and gratitude that God has chosen to build our family this way.

Sometimes, people fear adoption because of the worry that they won’t be able to love another who’s not of their flesh and blood. If you feel this way, I don’t blame you. That is a legitimate feeling.

But I do want to tell you this: All the love you have to give will all be transplanted into your heart by the author of love Himself.

For me and Fidel, adoption was not about us not having biological children—that became too shallow a reason. Rather, adoption became a conviction that kept us awake at night, with our hearts bleeding knowing that, as Christians, we must be the first to adopt, because we have experienced adoption ourselves.

As the Apostle Paul puts it,

“So in Christ Jesus, you are all children of God through faith.”

Galatians 3:26 NIV

Orphans don’t need nice things, they need parents; they don’t just need shelter, they need a home. It was through God’s love that we have experienced home, and it is through His love that we have that miraculous capacity to give an orphan a home.

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